Let it rain

I love music.  I love hearing new songs and rediscovering old classics.  There are so many notes, so many feelings left to linger and long ago memories that marry with the change of every chord and verse.  I love you so... My god, why am I only hearing this now for the first time.  I feel like crying, it is so beautiful. Everything happens for a reason, and the reason is that the time is right, the time is now and the soul is in tune to the strings of the universe.  It's raining, and the rain is pouring into my thoughts. "It is the summer of my smiles - flee from me Keepers of the Gloom" is winning the moment. I want everyday to be a summer of smiles but the keepers do not leave. It is the time and things are clear.  I am connected as connected as anyone could perceive to be.  Connected to all that is, connected to the wonder of life and the amazing, absolutely awe struck feeling of body numbing goose-bump goodness.  It's in me.  The summer shines but not nearly as bright as it should. The pain surfaces and the gloom of regret returns; the flowers no longer bloom.  I never thought about tomorrow, and tomorrow has won with so little regard of time.  My time is over; it was over yesterday.  Negative notions and erroneous egocentric evaluations make emotions.  Let them fall Brian. Let the tears fall. Nobody cares. Nobody will care whether you love them all so.  I never thought you would ever go.  You went and I let you go.  I'm sorry I couldn't save you.  I'm sorry I lost you. I miss you, miss your laugh and your smile.  I want every moment to be a summer full of smiles.  Those terrible tears.  They're a touching tribute to your regret. A dedication to that wicked wish which forever burns away the summer.  Where has my time gone - lost to yesterday.  Tomorrow will never know.  Tears are falling and they're falling for everyone. I love you so very much...and if the holders of hate are ever willed away, I want you to know, my heart is broken.  Shattered pieces that try to shine but the light is dim.  Many have I loved and many times I have wondered how many can I know.  "Leaves are falling around, time I was on my way. Thanks to you I'm much obliged, such a pleasant stay.  But it's time for me to go..."  the islands await, really they can wait.  I have much to say, so much to ramble on. Drank a few glasses of white wine tonight (thanks sparkles), three if you're counting and one over the loco line. Marveled at the smoke and smoked the marvelous. Played sneaky peaky with chuckles after too many rounds of five hundred.  Spreading this and spreading that gets thin after a while.  But we sneaked a peak at another great game (don't lay them one by one) the keepers are keeping track and toll.  Taking a toll on the soul.  Happiness, no more.  It's raining again and I miss you.  The door is always open and the key is in C.  I'm proud of the few piano keys, classical no doubt. No words but your own. No moving feelings from moving pictures, just raw notes. I need it raw.  It's hard without it.  Ode to moonlight, ode to the joy of life.